Ex- English captain Lewis Moody has disclosed he has been diagnosed with motor neurone disease and stated he cannot yet confront the full implications of the muscle-degenerating condition that took the lives of fellow rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow.
The middle-aged sportsman, who was involved in the World Cup champion 2003 side and won numerous English and European titles with Leicester, appeared on BBC Breakfast two weeks after learning he has the illness.
"There's something about looking the future in the face and being reluctant to completely absorb that at the moment," he commented.
"This doesn't mean I don't understand where it's heading. We comprehend that. But there is absolutely a unwillingness to face what's ahead for now."
Moody, conversing together with his wife Annie, says conversely he feels "at ease" as he directs his attention to his present health, his family and getting ready for when the illness worsens.
"Possibly that's surprise or possibly I deal with matters in another way, and once I have the information, it's more manageable," he stated further.
Early Symptoms
Moody discovered he had MND after noticing some reduced power in his shoulder area while exercising in the gym.
After physiotherapy failed to improve the condition, a number of scans revealed neural pathways in his central nervous system had been damaged by MND.
"You're presented with this medical finding of MND and we're understandably quite moved about it, but it's so strange because I sense that I'm perfectly healthy," he added.
"I don't sense unwell. I don't feel unwell
"The signs I have are rather minimal. I have a small amount of muscle wasting in the hand area and the upper arm.
"I remain competent to accomplishing anything and everything. And optimistically that will persist for as long as is possible."
Disease Development
MND can develop quickly.
According to the organization MND Association, the illness kills a third of people within a year and above half within 24 months of detection, as eating and inhalation become harder.
Therapy can only delay deterioration.
"It's not me that I feel sad for," added an emotional Moody.
"There's sorrow around having to tell my mum - as an sole offspring - and the ramifications that has for her."
Household Consequences
Conversing from the residence with his wife and their family dog by his side, Moody was overwhelmed by sentiment when he mentioned informing his sons - 17-year Dylan and 15-year-old Ethan - the traumatic news, commenting: "That represented the most difficult thing I've ever had to do."
"They are two excellent boys and that was pretty devastating," Moody said.
"We positioned ourselves on the couch in weeping, Ethan and Dylan both hugging in each other, then the dog jumped over and began licking the drops off our faces, which was quite funny."
Moody said the emphasis was staying in the moment.
"There exists no treatment and that is why you have to be so militantly directed on just embracing and appreciating each moment now," he commented.
"As Annie said, we've been truly lucky that the only real decision I made when I retired from playing was to allocate as much duration with the kids as possible. We can't reclaim those years back."
Player Link
Top-level athletes are disproportionately impacted by MND, with research proposing the rate of the condition is up to sixfold higher than in the general population.
It is considered that by limiting the air available and creating harm to motor neurone cells, frequent, strenuous exercise can initiate the disease in those already predisposed.
Rugby Professional Life
Moody, who gained 71 England caps and competed with the British and Irish Lions in New Zealand in 2005, was dubbed 'Mad Dog' during his playing career, in recognition of his brave, relentless approach to the game.
He competed through a fracture of his leg for a period with Leicester and once caused a workout confrontation with colleague and friend Martin Johnson when, irritated, he abandoned a tackle pad and commenced engaging in collisions.
After entering as a reserve in the Rugby World Cup championship win over Australia in 2003, he claimed a ball at the end of the line-out in the decisive passage of play, establishing a platform for playmaker Matt Dawson to snipe and Jonny Wilkinson to kick the game-deciding field goal.
Backing Community
Moody has previously informed Johnson, who led England to that championship, and a few other previous team-mates about his condition, but the rest will be finding out his news with the remainder of public.
"There will be a moment when we'll need to lean on their assistance but, at the moment, just having that kind of love and recognition that people are there is the crucial thing," he said.
"This game is such a excellent group.
"I said to the kids the other day, I've had an extraordinary life.
"Even should it finished now, I've enjoyed all of it and accepted all of it and got to do it with remarkable people.
"When you get to label your love your profession, it's one of the greatest privileges.
"Achieving this for so long a period with the groups that I did it with was a pleasure. And I am aware they will wish to assist in every way they can and I await having those discussions."
